30 Brilliant Ways To Hack Your Booze

Because if you spend too much time finding/opening/chilling your alcohol, you won’t have as much time to drink it. SOURCE

1. Keep your pitcher cold yet undiluted with a plastic cup of ice.

2. Or the bottom half of a two-liter bottle.

Just cut the plastic bottle in half, fill with ice water and garnishes, and put in the liquor bottle.

3. Or in salted ice.

This’ll get your beverage cold in a hurry.

4. Or with frozen grapes.

5. Or nature.

8. Or a boat.

Who doesn’t have a spare boat filled with ice, is my question.

9. Freeze your leftover* wine to use in sauces.

*HAHAHAHAHHAHA.

10. Keep your beers neatly stacked in the fridge with a binder clip.

11. Bring your drink anywhere with Sneaky Shorts.

AKA the most well-named product ever. Buy them here.

12. Learn the sacred truth that you can open a beer with anything, like a plug.

13. And a door.

14. Another beer.

15. With a sword.

No, srsly. Anderson Cooper not included.

16. A stapler.

Here’s how.

17. A cell phone.

You have to buy this case first.

18. The handles of a can opener.

19. Why use a manual corkscrew when you can do it in a tenth of the time with a drill?

20. Know how much you’re drinking.

According to Solo, this isn’t actually true, but hey, ballpark awareness is better than none.

21. Make a delightful memento out of a champagne cork.

Perfect for the littlest dinner party!

22. Create your own R2-Booze2.

23. Use a rake to cheaply and easily store wine glasses.

24. If you don’t feel like DRINKING-drinking, make moonshine marshmallows.

Directions here.

25. Or vodka-soaked oranges.

Directions here.

26. A boozy sundae:

Directions here.

27. Drunken gummy bears:

Directions here.

28. One of many booze cakes:

Get the book here.

29. Or, for the more literally-minded:

30. And most importantly: Ensure you’ll never spill your beer again.